She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
