last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
