Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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