She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
