so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
