One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
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