I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
