O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Randomize