Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
