I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Randomize
