Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
