Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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