So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
