This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
