I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Randomize
