So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
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