We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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