But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
