so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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