Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
