It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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