You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
