I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
