I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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