One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Randomize
