I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
