question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
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