Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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