I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize