I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
