at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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