He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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