it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
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