i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
