he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
