Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
