C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
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