I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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