end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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