please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize