I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
