God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize