Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize
