I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
