Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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