Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
