Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
You're breaking my sexual little heart
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
the raccoons are back...
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