More tranny stories later!
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
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