we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize
