similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Randomize
